


Chaos Theory

by red_racer_fan



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Case Fic, Dirk meets Todd on this case, Living Together, M/M, Science Fiction
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-21
Updated: 2018-06-30
Packaged: 2019-04-05 09:55:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14041698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/red_racer_fan/pseuds/red_racer_fan
Summary: Dirk is working on a regular missing cat case (those make up the majority of his calls,) when he encounters something that will eventually change the course of his life. With the help of his newly appointed, reluctant sidekick Todd, will they be able to crack the case, or will the case crack them first?The "Meeting Under Different Circumstances" AU





	1. Of Lost Animals and Misguided Men

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone, this is my first Dirk Gently based fanfiction and I hope you enjoy it. Be prepared for irregular update intervals.

Dirk was beginning to feel like this case might be a lost cause. The ground was laden with this morning’s fallen snow, which really should have been a deterrent as it hid any potential evidence. However, he tried to reason with himself that if there were any paw prints on the fresh snow it would be fairly simple from that point on to find the cat.

Yet, finding the beginning of said tracks was proving to be quite the conundrum. It was his sixth day since he took up the case, and shaking a bag of cat treats and shouting ‘Bernard’ into the streets wasn’t going to cut it two days ago. He’d since gotten more creative in his attempts to find Bernard, setting up several Stick-and-Box traps baited with cat treats around the area. So far, he’d managed to catch two squirrels and a racoon.

Dirk sat high up in a tree near the client’s house figuring the cat would remain close by. Through his binoculars certain backyards looked more promising then others. The ones with covers over their easily accessible balconies were far more likely to house a wandering cat than the ones without. He sniffled and shivered a little. Despite his thick bright yellow leather jacket, the cold continued to seep into his skin.

He watched for any signs of movement, but it was not a busy neighbourhood and the most he saw was the occasional car. Dirk let his mind drift off until he noticed a large white van pull into the driveway at a red house, two doors down from his client. A bulky woman stepped out of the car, and began loading large glass tanks onto a cart. She rang the doorbell and waited until a much smaller man came out to meet her. Dirk saw him make some hand gestures and point towards the garage.

“Hey, what are you doing up there?!” A deep voice called from down below.

Dirk flailed a little on the branch he was sitting on. His binoculars momentarily fell from his hands but the string around his neck kept them from dropping to the ground. Quickly regaining his composure Dirk replied,

“No need to be alarmed sir, just the Friendly Neighbourhood Watch.” The man looked up at him skeptically, he seemed to be holding something. Dirk, for once, was not eager to find out what.

“I’m pretty sure the neighbourhood watch doesn’t watch their neighbours _when they’re in their homes._ ” Dirk recognized that tone of voice, that was the I’m Building Up My Anger to Kick Your Ass voice.

“I assure you, we do, it’s a new security measure were taking called pre-empti-” Despite Dirk’s attempt at staying in control, the man cut him off.

“Now that I’m thinking about it, I don’t even think this neighbourhood has a Neighbourhood Watch.”

Dirk responded without hesitation, “Oh yes we do, er, what’s your name?”

“Greg.”

“Okay Greg, I can give you the number of my head supervisor and you can take up your problem with him. Just give me a second to get down from here.” Dirk carefully descended and landed with a practiced stance. Much to Dirk’s dismay he saw that Greg was holding a bat.

“I understand how this must look, but he’ll clear everything up.” Dirk said pulling out his phone to scroll through his contacts. “Would I wear this bright yellow jacket if I didn’t want to be spotted?” The answer of course was yes, yes he would.

The man hummed for a second considering this, “I guess not.” He eventually replied. Dirk grinned.

“I have minutes so if we could use your phone that would be great.” Dirk said.

“Fine.” Dirk waited as the man sighed and pulled out his phone.

“What’s the number?” he asked looking down at his phone.

“519-882-4988” 

Greg turned away holding the phone up to his ear. On the second ring the line answered.

“Hi, this is Mark from Pizza Express, how can I help you?”

“Er, I think I’ve got the wrong number.” The man said turning around and hanging up. In the distance he saw a shrinking yellow jacket.

“Hey, get back here!”

 

Dirk panted and turned the corner. Hearing the other man’s quick approach, he ducked behind a nearby bush. He watched as the man rounded on the corner and began searching the area.

“I’ll find you, you creep!” He shouted.

Dirk scanned the area for easy places he could run and hide to until he was far enough away to make an escape. The parking garage across the way was too out in the open. Behind him, there was a backyard fence, but it looked too high to jump without calling attention to himself. Dirk’s eyes landed on some tall hedges a short distance away that looked promising.

Dirk poked his head out from behind the bush to check Greg’s whereabouts, he saw him checking houses across the street and a little ahead, looking at-. Looking at Bernard.

_Right._

Right?

Right.

Dirk thought he really ought to have expected this. Unfortunately timed, fortunate coincidences were practically the universe’s signature. He continued to watch as Bernard lazily strolled across a neighbouring driveway, climbed on top of some old boxes, and jumped up on top of a low fence. This, he realized, was a crucial moment. Did he pursue Bernard at the risk of confronting Greg? Or was he meant to wait until the danger had passed to go after him?

Then he thought to ponder why it was that all of his cases seemed to lead to him running for his life. It really wasn’t fair, he argued to himself, he was doing good, but no matter what he was working on he always seemed to be misinterpreted as some kind of criminal. Although, he added mentally, _I do sometimes end up in ‘compromising’ positions, like that time with the turtles_. He grimaced at the thought.

It was during this internal contemplation that Greg made the connection between freshly fallen snow, footsteps, and finding people.

 _Alright_ , Dirk thought, _when he looks the other way I’ll make a break for the bush next door, cross the street, hide behind the tree, climb over the fence, and follow Bernard._

However, before Dirk’s plan could take place he was made all too aware of a fatal flaw in his plan. He had taken his eyes off Greg.

“I got you now you now, you fucking pervert.”

Dirk whipped around to see Greg two yards behind him, his face red and his bat gripped tightly in his hand. As Greg brought up his bat and swung it forward, Dirk rolled out of the way narrowly missing a swing directed at his head. Without trying to justify himself Dirk picked himself up and began sprinting towards Bernard. Greg followed closely behind him.

As it turns out, cats are much less likely to allow someone to pick them up while that someone is running top speed at them. Unsurprisingly, Bernard took to running away as well, quickly hopping to the other side of the fence he was perched on. Dirk quickly decided that his best course of action was to pursue Bernard over said fence, and with much difficulty he threw himself over, narrowly avoiding another one of Greg’s swings. He landed not without scrapes, but figured that having some splinters beat having some broken bones.

“Get your ass back here!” He Greg yelled from the other side of the fence, he thought it would be best not to reply.

Pausing for a moment to catch his breath, he glanced around the backyard for Bernard. Even for a cat he was extremely elusive. However, for once today, Dirk’s plan actually worked. Looking down at the snow he saw a smattering of cat paw impressions leading to the backdoor of the house. The cat flap on the door was swaying back and forth.

Dirk reasoned it was a bit late to give up now, and since Greg had probably called the police he had under ten minutes to retrieve Bernard. _Please don’t be locked, please don’t be locked._ Dirk thought as he reached for the doorknob. As though the door had heard his prayer, when he turned the knob it opened without a sound.

Dirk quietly stepped into the house, leaving the door open behind him should he need to make a hasty escape.

“Bernard” Dirk called softly, making a tutting sound on the roof of his mouth in an attempt to draw him in. He saw the swish of his fluffy tail disappear around the corner of the hall. Dirk briskly strode towards the hallway, but abruptly stopped before he reached the corner when he heard a man speaking.

“I don’t care about your excuses, I’ll see to it myself if I have to. I’ll be at the hotel by twelve tomorrow,” The voice paused for a second, “Yes, the one on 49th West, what are you, an idiot?”

Dirk would vehemently deny being psychic to the ends of the earth, but sometimes he would feel what he could only describe as ‘the pull of the universe.’ This was one of those times. The very core of his being was telling him that he needed to be here right now, in this house, listening to these words. It was at these times that Dirk felt he could see the ‘direction of the stream’ more clearly then ever. Something was going to happen tomorrow at three o’ clock at a hotel on West 49th, and he was meant to be there.

“Get it done.” The voice said and the conversation was clearly over. Dirk listened closely for the sound of feet, and upon hearing the traveling sound of them walking away he poked his head around the corner.

Comfortably sitting in the hallway was Bernard. Dirk slowly approached him, cautious about making noise, and then deftly hoisted the cat up into his arms, he put up a surprising lack of resistance. Dirk swiftly left the way he had came, and scurried around the side of the house to get back to the sidewalk. There were no signs of Greg or the police as of yet, so that was good.

Not taking anymore chances Dirk made for his client’s house, his speed just under a jog as not to draw unwanted attention to himself. Upon reaching the door he gave a hard knock, then thought to ring the doorbell just in case. _Maybe one more time._ Dirk thought and pressed the button again, glancing anxiously around the neighbourhood. From inside the house he could hear the thumping of descending footfalls.

An elderly woman opened the door and a strong smell of incense rushed out of the house. She was wearing a bright blue and purple patterned dress with flecks of sparkles.

“Bernard!” She cried happily, and reached out to take him from Dirk who handed him over with a smile. “Thank you, I’m so glad you found him.” She said now looking at Dirk. “Come on in for a cuppa, its freezing outside.” She gestured for Dirk to come inside.

“Well, if you insist.” Dirk smiled, and stepped into the house.


	2. A Wander into the Lion's Den

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Picks up where chapter one left off. Just an update in chapter positions, I realized it might be easier to read this way.

“Would you prefer orange pekoe, or earl grey?” the elderly woman called from her kitchen where the water had just finished boiling.

“Oh, _definitely_ orange pekoe.” Dirk stressed as though the very thought of earl grey made him physically sick.

“Have a strong opinion about tea, do you?” She asked, plopping the tea bags into cups.

“Er, not particularly. You see Margaret, if there is one thing I’ve learned, it’s that when one is in the position of an absence of opinion, the best course of action is pretend to have a very strong one. Better to take control of your decisions rather than not.” Dirk explained, rustling about on the couch trying to find a comfortable spot. It was harder than it looked.

“That’s an,” Margaret paused for a moment trying to think of an appropriate adjective, “interesting approach.” She finished, carrying in a tray with an assortment of cookies, some cream, and an ornate jar with a spoon in it that Dirk supposed contained sugar.

The room looked as cozy as it felt, which was to say, not very cozy at all. The counters were made of sleek marble, the dining and coffee tables were plain and rectangular, there was an assortment of chairs, at least Dirk thought they were chairs, they had looked like they had come from a collection called “Furniture Without Purpose.” Everything about the house felt like it hadn’t so much been bought from an IKEA catalogue book, but actually _was_ the IKEA catalogue. The couch, which Dirk was immediately attracted to seeing as it was the only piece of furniture in the room which looked vaguely sittable, was deceiving.

Although it appeared well stuffed and lush with pillows, everything about it made him just slightly uncomfortable. There was always one lump which popped up at just the wrong spot, or a cushion edge which was seemed to come out of nowhere to poke him in the arm.

What Dirk found the oddest about the house wasn’t even the interior design, it was Margaret. She stuck out like a sore thumb, but in a good way? Margaret was warm in all the ways that the house was cold, from her red rimmed glasses to her open posture. The juxtaposition baffled Dirk, but he wasn’t quite sure how to broach the question. Instead he watched in silence as Margaret placed the tray on the on the coffee table and then thanked her.

“Where did you find him anyway?” Margaret questioned, drawing Dirk out of his thoughts.

“Up the road a bit that way.” Dirk pointed in the direction that he thought he came from, although if he was entirely honest he would say that he was a bit occupied at the time.

“I have to say, as much as I hoped that he was out there, I almost believed that he didn’t make it, especially considering the frosty weather we’ve been having lately.” Margaret commented regretfully. Dirk thought about this for a moment, and agreed that it was an unlikely occurrence however it wasn’t impossible. Then, thinking on it further, he felt the need to elaborate.

“Now that you mention it, it does seem strange, however I’ve been told cats can be quite resourceful.” As he spoke it sounded, to his ears at least, that he was trying to convince himself as such. Which was not an irregular occurrence, often when he was dealing with problems (which was less of a when and more of a constant struggle,) he would tell himself ‘its not _that_ bad” even when it clearly was ‘ _that_ bad’.

“Bernard’s a lazy cat,” Margaret said, “he wouldn’t have gone far. He probably just stayed at one of the empty houses in the area.”

“I haven’t seen many empty houses around here.” Dirk commented in a skeptical, but not accusatory, tone which made it clear he wanted her to elaborate.

“Ah, well there might not be too many anymore. There have been a lot of new neighbours this past month, why they’d want to move in the middle of winter beats me, but that’s city prices for you. It’s like stepping on a half-inflated mattress with the plug still in, when the high prices hit the city the people scatter, and where the people go, the money go.” She said shrugging her shoulders.

Dirk, who had never _actually_ paid for rent, choosing instead to flee the premises when it eventually became an issue, felt deeply under educated about how the real estate market worked, but nonetheless nodded along to her words in agreement. He stayed until the teapot was empty and then politely excused himself. They made small talk as Dirk put on his coat and shoes, Margaret insisted that Dirk come again and Dirk agreed despite thinking that she probably only asked to be polite. Dirk almost forgot about being paid, _almost,_ and thus very casually he mentioned his fees. Margaret looked surprised at herself for having forgotten and quickly rushed to go retrieve it. Less than a minute later she returned and handed Dirk an envelope with a hefty weight to it. Dirk thanked her, never one to miss an opportunity to self promote, he handed her a couple of his business cards, all of them read “DIRK GENTLY” and printed smaller below it read “Holistic Detective” followed by his phone number on the back.

As he stepped out of the house icy air blasted his face. At a less than sprint but certainly more than dawdle, Dirk hurried home, keeping a watchful eye out for Greg, or worse the _police_. Dirk felt overly conscious of how bright his jacket was, however he would rather risk being spotted than freeze on his trek home.

When he eventually reached his current battered apartment (or as he liked to call it ‘well loved’,) he immediately looked for a spare piece of paper. It was remarkably easy to find one considering they were scattered everywhere from all the other times he had needed to make a note, on it he wrote “49 West Hotel 12PM”. It was incredibly unlikely that he would forget such an important time and place, and even if he did he’d probably end up there anyway, but he figured there was no harm in it.

Once the note was written he allowed the whole weight of the day to fall upon his shoulders, and let exhaustion seep into his muscles. He placed the envelope of money inside his dresser and stripped his slightly damp clothes off, he winced as his they scratched some of the bruises and cuts he had acquired during the chase earlier. In favour of dealing with his injuries tomorrow he carefully rolled into bed. However, before falling asleep he quickly set an alarm on the old digital clock on his nightstand for twelve tomorrow, thinking that it would give him plenty of time to get ready and arrive early at the scene.

When Dirk’s eyes opened the next day, he felt so well rested that he was immediately suspicious. The sunlight that crept into the room through the holes in the blinds only elevated his mistrust. He looked over at his alarm clock and found that his suspicion was rightly placed, next to him in green flashing numbers it said 1:23 am. He reasoned that the power must have gone out last night and messed with his alarm clock.

His heart pounded in panic. Quickly, he got out of bed and rushed towards his jacket in the living room. He rifled through his pockets until he found his phone. The screen was dim and the battery was at three percent but he could still read the time clearly, 11:38.

On one hand, if he left now he could definitely be at the hotel by twelve o’clock, _but on the other_ , his skin felt sticky, his muscles were still kind of sore, and he wasn’t even getting paid to be there. Choosing to settle for somewhere in the middle, he decided to have a quick shower, grab some breakfast to go, and then leave.

And _oh_ was it worth it. As the grime from the previous day rinsed of his skin Dirk felt increasingly better about his new case. He threw on a relatively fresh set of clothes, pulled on his yellow jacket, grabbed a granola bar and banana, and sped out the door. He checked his phone as he walked and munched on his snacks, it read 11:55 then snapped to black as the company’s logo shone. Luckily, he lived fairly close to West 49 th and could probably be there in about fifteen or so minutes if he kept up a hearty pace.

When he did reach West 49th he encountered an unforeseen issue. West 49th was a long street, and the thing about long streets was there were bound to be a lot of buildings, and when there were a lot of buildings it became a tad difficult to locate an unnamed hotel. Of course, if his handy-dandy cell phone was up to par he could simply look up hotels on West 49th, but alas the universe wanted to be difficult today. It always wanted to be difficult on today’s day.

But Dirk had a tactic he liked to use in situations like these. He called it “Zen Operating” and it essentially entailed following the first person he saw who looked like they knew where they were going.

Dirk looked around until he caught the confident stride of a young women walking away from him down the street. From a Not A Stalker distance, Dirk followed until she turned and walked into a bank. His eyes flicked around for a new subject, and he spotted an elderly woman who had just stepped out of a cab carrying some luggage. Again, he followed, but this time for not nearly as long because within a minute of stepping out of the cab she entered a building. Dirk looked up and saw the glowing letters of the Perriman Grand Hotel, and felt the dread that had been building in his stomach vanish.

The inside of the hotel was well furnished in an old-fashioned sense where everything looked like it had been high quality about twenty to thirty years ago. Yet, the interior design did nothing to stifle the hustle and bustle that occurred. People buzzed around pulling cases of luggage in every direction, and Dirk figured it was time to gamble. The crowds focus on getting out of and getting into their rooms, probably weren’t going to be much help in locating anything vaguely case-like. Instead he poked his eyes around the room looking for the most suspicious person. He glanced over well-dressed business people and irritated families, but it was glaringly obvious what didn’t fit it. Standing over by the elevators were two bald men in grey jumpsuits.

Dirk causally walked over to the elevator to stand beside them. When the doors opened and the men stepped inside Dirk pursued. However, before they shut one of the men put his hand over the gap where the doors would close.

“This elevator’s going down. You should get the next one.”

“Oh,” Dirk laughed pretending to be confused, “Thanks for letting me know.” He said and stepped out, watching as the doors closed. He waited for the next one and then descended.

The basement was confusing. The halls spiraled out like twisted branches which made no real sort of sense. He walked around opening doors one after the other finding nothing but old offices. As he again turned another one of the endless corners, and caught sight of a door opening. Two bald men stepped out and turned the opposite direction from Dirk to continue walking. His best bet was in that room and he wasted no time getting to it, as soon as the men were out of sight he practically sprinted over.

He slowly creaked open the door and when nothing exploded, he turned on the light. He wished he was surprised when he saw the security guard tied up on the floor. Dirk closed the door in case the bald men returned, and then paced over to guard. First, checked his pulse and was relieved to find that it was still beating.

“Hey, hey, are you awake?” he poked at the guard’s arm, and just in case, Dirk slapped him (lightly) across the face. The guard did not wake.

Dirk walked around to the other side of the guard where his hands were cuffed behind his back and attached to some piping. He bent down to give the cuffs a tug, because _maybe they were the flimsy kind of metal, who knows?_ But sadly, they were not the ‘flimsy’ kind of metal.

Before he could try any other kind of test to break or unlock the cuffs, the door opened. Dirk froze in fear, expecting one of the bald men, but was relieved to find that it was only a member of the hotel staff wearing a funny hat.

“Hi, can you help me with this?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Y'all,  
> Sorry it took so long to update, I hope you like it. Next chapter will be continuing on with the plot, maybe from Todd's point of view.


	3. The Beginning of a Beautiful Friendship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Todd's life escalates to radical levels in under an hour. Also, Dirk is there.

Todd stared vacantly behind the front desk of the Perriman Grand Hotel, the voice of his angry landlord echoing in his head.

_Where’s the goddamn rent? I want my six hundred bucks. I want my money. I swear to god I will kill you._

Each following statement dropped into his head like falling water creating ripples, but instead of the ripples slowly dissipating they only became larger and more consuming. Todd was sure that if the noise in his head had different volumes Dorian’s would make him deaf.

As Todd gazed over to his left, he caught sight of the familiar sleek grey suit of his boss, and all at once the angry waves of his landlord’s voice ceased.

“Mr. Palacios, can I talk to you for a moment?” Todd asked rushing out from behind the desk to match Mr. Palacios’s unwavering stride.

“Todd, just the man I wanted to see. I need you to go check room 802.” Palacios stated, looking at Todd briefly before turning towards an elderly woman who appeared to be arriving.

“Yes, I will but-”

“Welcome to the Perriman Grand,” Palacios began, with a sweeping gesture of his arm. “Let us help you with that.” He said directing his hand to the luggage and snapping his fingers. Without looking to see if his employees collected the luggage he continued walking.

“I was wondering if I could get my check a little early this month.” Todd breathed out in a rush, afraid that if he didn’t say it fast enough Mr. Palacios would encounter another customer and be swept away in a flurry of snaps and greetings.

Mr. Palacios slowed his pacing and turned toward him, putting a hand on his back.

“What? Why? Are you okay?” He asked, his eyebrows furrowing together.

“Yeah,” Todd replied hastily. “I-I could just use the money.” He finished, slower but more hesitantly.

“Look Todd, I need you to get to room 802 right away, guests have been reporting some kind of drilling sound.” Mr. Palacios said brushing him off as they reached the elevator.

“Please Mr. Palacios, is there anything I could do for an advance?”

Mr. Palacios paused for a moment in thought, going uncharacteristically still. Then he brightened, “Actually, if you could do me a favour I would have time to discuss this further with you. You’re pretty handy, right Todd?”

Todd looked blankly at Mr. Palacios for second, forgetting that he required a response. Mr. Palacios arched his eyebrow at him, and Todd rushed out an affirmative.

“er, yeah I guess so.”

“Great. Guests have been reporting problems with the waters heating this morning, and a plumber isn’t available until this afternoon. If you could go down to the boiler room and see if there are any stunningly obvious solutions, that would be fantastic.”

“I can do that.” Todd nodded. Mr. Palacios reached into his pocket and retrieved a ring of keys, from which he plucked a particularly old looking one.

“Thanks Todd, and if anything seems out of your depth, don’t try to fix it, just wait until the plumber arrives.” He said, and handed Todd the key.

“And then we can talk about getting an advance?”

“Yes, later.” Mr. Palacios said walking away.

“Okay.” Todd said, although he was fairly sure Mr. Palacios did not hear him. Feeling slightly relieved, yet not entirely trusting Mr. Palacios, Todd decided to just deal with it as Mr. Palacios proposed and think about it ‘later’.

The instant the elevator doors shut behind him Todd brought out his phone to make a call. While he had been getting ready for work this morning he had seen the six missed calls from Amanda, but couldn’t bring himself to call her then. He could say he was feeling overwhelmed by his encounter with Dorian or that he was in a rush, but deep down he knew that it was because he was afraid. Afraid of telling her he didn’t have the money she needed, afraid of hearing her pain and not being there to help, afraid because he knew it was his fault. He also knew that he couldn’t put it off forever.

He listened to the ringing of the line until he heard a voice saying, ‘I hate voicemail’ and the banging of drums, followed by a single beep.

“Hey sis, its me. I want you to know that I’m not ignoring you, I just don’t know if I have the money right now. I know I promised you, but there have been some,” Todd paused for a second and thought of Dorian taking a bat to his car, “unforeseen circumstances. But, I’m gonna get past it, I’m gonna get you the money, and you’re going to be okay. I’ll talk to you soon.” Todd finished. He felt worried that Amanda hadn’t picked up, but also kind of glad that he didn’t have to admit it to her and listen to her response.

The elevator doors dinged signalling that he had reached the 18th floor, and pulled apart. Todd walked down the hallway until he had reached room 802 and knocked. From inside he could hear the thumping of feet and rapid increase in movement. Todd waited for a moment and then rapped his knuckles against the door once more, and this time a man came out wearing a grey jumpsuit. He was at least a head taller than Todd, had a bald but tattooed head, and an odd look in his eyes.

“Er hi, I was sent up to tell you that because this room isn’t registered for a late-checkout and has been reserved for this afternoon, we need you to please leave.” Todd half-lied, sometimes when there were particularly rowdy guests who were leaving in the morning instead of telling them that they were being too loud he would bring up the ‘late check-out excuse’, which usually got them to leave more readily.

The man paused for a moment too long, never ceasing to look Todd dead in the eye, until he eventually responded with a simple, “Okay.” and closed the door. Todd, who had experienced much worse manners that guests decided to leave in, took this as a win. He turned away from the door intending to leave, but the man who he had just talked to came piling out carrying a large suitcase, following him came another man who looked uncannily similar carrying another large suitcase. Todd quickly recalibrated his plans and stepped aside as they rambled up to the elevator, which opened immediately, and watched as they ducked inside. Not eager to ride in a small box with either of them, Todd decided to wait until the next one.

Knowing that it might be a minute before the next elevator arrived Todd indulged his curiosity about the reports of the apparent ‘drilling’ sound. Strangely enough, the room looked untouched, but not untouched in the “guests were very polite and remade their bed and set everything back into its rightful place” way, untouched in the “they were never used” way. If Todd didn’t know better he’d think that the room hadn’t been signed out at all.

The only indication that anyone had been inside the room, short of witnessing them exit, came from faint scent of sawdust. Todd wandered around the room for the source, and despite feeling like he might be missing something, let it go.

With one problem out of the way, Todd descended to the basement to check out the boiler room. Although he agreed to check if there were any issues Todd was fully aware of the fact that he had only the vaguest idea of how plumbing worked. He figured that as long as he looked inside, he could hand it off to an experienced plumber this afternoon.

The basement was poorly lit and equally poorly organized, it was as though the architect thought themselves a modern Daedalus, but the only places they had been allowed to construct their monstrous maze in was at the bottom of old hotels where nobody would question their choices. Todd sighed, and set off to look for the boiler room. He was sure there was a map down here but it appeared to be conveniently absent for his present dilemma. For the first few minutes he encountered a stream of janitor’s closets and abandoned offices, gaining a better appreciation for room labeling with every room. He continued this ‘trial and error’ approach until from a short distance he noticed a labelled blue sign attached to one of them. Upon closer inspection he saw that it read ‘Boiler Room’ and his shoulders sagged in relief.

Todd reached for the knob and found that the door was surprisingly unlocked. As he opened it he could see that there was a light on inside. Todd noticed a few key things in rapid sequence. The first thing he perceived was the man in the bright yellow jacket. The second thing his eyes darted to was who the man in the yellow jacket was bending over, which was what appeared to be the Perriman Grand’s only security guard knocked out and handcuffed to one of the many pipes in the room.

The man in the yellow jacket looked up at him and a variety of emotions flitted across his face. Beginning with fear, then relief, followed by confusion, what looked like hesitation, and ending with a smile.

“Hi, could you help me with this?” the man asked, and gestured towards the guard. Todd who was frozen at the door, was only plagued by a deeper confusion at this question. It was only when the man dropped his smile that he regained control of his limbs. Without thinking, he rushed forward and began wrestling the man. Todd put an arm around his shoulders, trying to reach around his neck, but he man flailed a bit and escaped his hold for a second. As the man stood up Todd threw a hard punch at his jaw.

“Ow!” The man exclaimed holding a hand to his face, and Todd stepped back for a moment. “Right, now you’re gonna get it.” the man said posing himself in ninja position “Hyah! Hya!” he shouted and waved his arms like in a karate movie. Todd quickly realized that the man had no idea what he was doing, the man also seemed to realize that Todd had realized this and threw himself over some pipes. Todd’s bellboy hat fell off as he rushed around the side and continued his assault on the man.

“Stop it, stop it, Jesus! What the-push” The man said as he pushed Todd off of him.

“What the hell, man?” The man said as though Todd were the insane one in this situation.

“You, ‘what the hell?’ No! Me, ‘what the hell?’” Todd shouted. Then looking bewildered, he asked accusatorily, “How did you get in here?”

“Through the door, obviously.” The man said looking offended. Much to Todd’s alarm, the man suddenly walked up to him and grabbed his arm. “I’m trying to decide whether you’re a clue,” Todd felt the warmth of his hand through the thin sleeve, and wretched away from his grasp. “an accomplice, or an assistant.” The man continued, his eyes widening.

“Uh, what?” Todd felt that that when Mr. Palacios said to hand over anything ‘out of his depth’, this situation might apply. Todd shook his head as though physically trying to shake off the confusion and began asking questions in rapid succession, gesticulating more wildly with every word that escaped his mouth. “What are you doing in here? What happened to him? Who are you?”

“My name is Dirk Gently, and I’m a private detective sent here to investigate a case.” Dirk said calmly and professionally like he had delivered that sentence a thousand times over. Dirk walked back towards the tied-up security guard, “I was about to find out what happened to this man myself when you arrived. I think that it may have something to do with some ‘sudden renovations.’” Dirk said, making air quotes around ‘sudden renovations’ and dropping his voice, as though imitating someone who he had heard.

“Sudden renovations?” Todd asked, perplexed once again and letting the absurdity of the situation sink in before quickly denying that feeling, “No! you know what? We are going upstairs, calling an ambulance, or a medical team, or something, and you are going to explain this _whole_ situation.”

“That does sound at least partially reasonable, but I have to say I think, and I really, _really,_ hate to even suggest this, but we may want to contact the police.” Dirk’s face scrunched up as though his mouth were betraying his mind. “There is a man knocked out and tied up in a boiler room after all, and although I may find the perpetrator very rarely do I ever administer justice.” He justified as if he expected Todd to immediately rebuke his suggestion.

The proposal seemed completely reasonable, and later Todd would still not be able to explain why it had put him on edge. Maybe it was _because_ it was such a reasonable course of action in a frankly, quite odd situation, that made it all the more real but it just didn’t seem to fit.

Into the room from down the hallway, the sound of footfalls interrupted the conversation. Dirk’s eyes widened and he looked at Todd as though he were pleading.

“Do you trust me?” Dirk asked rushing toward the door. Todd looked him, and then at the security guard handcuffed to the piping.

“No!”

“Then shut up and hide anyway.” Dirk said and turned off the lights. Todd could hear Dirk’s scuttle towards the back corner of the room, the hurried movement was halted by a clang against a pipe and hissed intake of breath, a second later the scuttles returned at more cautious pacing. Todd would blame the sudden darkness that had befallen the room, he would argue that it confused him, making his mind susceptible to suggestion when he followed the footfalls to the back of the room.

“Crouch down.” Todd heard as a hand pulled him down to the floor. He could hear the steady intake of breath next to him and felt a warm arm brush against his. From outside the solid beat of feet approached, and the remnants of a conversation drifted into the room.

“I think they’re transferring him to the main facility.” One voice said.

“Makes sense, no way would they want to hold a guy in the suburbs, it’s too risky.” Another responded. Todd heard the creaking of the door knob turning, and ducked down lower as the light from the hall poured into the room. The light switch flicked on and the men walked toward the incapacitated guard. Todd peaked out from behind some pipes at the people, and his mouth fell open when he recognized them as the men he had met in room 802. However, the longer he looked at their faces the more he thought that these were not the men he encountered, but another set of bald, tattooed, tall men in grey jumpsuits.

“Do you have the key?” The only marginally taller of the two asked. The other man nodded in assertion and reached into his pocket to produce a small silver key. Todd watched as they uncuffed the guard, who still had not stirred.

“I’ll take the arms, you take the legs.” The man who carried the key said, and walked around behind the guard. Todd took a moment then to look at Dirk, who was not watching the men at all but staring at something across the room. Todd followed his gaze until it landed on his bell-boy hat, the one that must have fell off during their fight. As though Todd acknowledging the existence of the hat shone a light on it, the man who had been about to grab the guard’s arms gaze shifted and landed on the item.

“Hey, what’s that over there?” He said and pointed at the object. Todd worried that the men would be able to hear his heartbeat. The other man turned, looked around for a moment until his eyes fell on the item, and then picked it up.

“Looks like some kind of hat.” The man said, spinning it around in his hand.

“Do you think someone has been in here?” The other man asked and Todd felt like he was going to have an aneurism right there.

“And left the guard just sitting here? Fat chance.”

“Maybe they came down here, realized they couldn’t move him, and went back upstairs for reinforcements.” The other man reasoned back, and his body stiffened.

“Well, we won’t have to worry about that it we just move him outt’a here before anyone comes down.”

“I guess.” The man replied, and without further commentary they hoisted the guard under their arms and left the room, turning off the lights as hey left.

“What the hell just happened.” Todd said to the dark room after the sound of the men can no longer be heard.

“I think,” Dirk paused for a moment, “I know why I’m here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wowza, this was really fun to write and I'm looking forward to putting out the next chapter.


	4. The End of a Long Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Todd goes home and meets an unexpected guest.

The End of a Long Day

 

“I think I know why I’m here.” Dirk said to the dark room.

 

“What the hell does that even _mean_?” Todd said, his voice was strained as he whipped his head toward Dirk. “Who were those guys? What did they want? And where are they taking that guard?” Despite not being able to see Todd, Dirk got the impression that he may have been pacing, or at the very least gesticulating expressively.

 

“I don’t know, to all of those questions. However, I would like to find out, but the primary lead is walking away right now so if you don’t mind, I’ll have to pursue that.” Dirk said while stumbling toward what he assumed was the front of the room. After a couple awkward clangs, Dirk flicked on the light switch.

“It was nice to meet you, and I’m quite certain we’ll be meeting again very soon. The universe has a way with these kinds of things.” Dirk said waving his hand as he spoke, then nodding, he ducked out of the room.

“Hey, wait!” Todd called out and rushed towards the door. He threw it open in time to see Dirk sprint down the hall and make a sharp turn down a corridor. For a moment, he thought about running after him but then thought better of it, it wasn’t his job to chase lunatics.

 

_His job._

 

“Oh god, I have to tell my boss about this.”

 

* * *

 

 

Todd didn’t have a lot of experiences with the police, but when he did (reporting his band equipment ‘stolen’) he would say that it had gone fairly decently. Going off this past experience, he assumed that they would be somewhat comforting, inquisitive, and overall helpful. That was not how it went at all.

 

“To recap, you say you saw a man in a yellow jacket named Dirk standing over the incapacitated guard, but it _wasn’t_ him who tied him up. That the real perpetrator was two men in grey jumpsuits who carried the guard away, and then Dirk just up and _disappeared_.” The younger officer said skeptically.

 

“Er yes?” Todd said shrugging, all too aware of his boss’s presence in the back of the room.

 

“Did you know that most perpetrators in murder cases report the crime themselves?” The older, more brittle of the two asked, but it was more of a statement. The way he leaned in towards Todd and raised his brows skeptically, made him feel like he was being interrogated. Which Todd supposed he was.

 

“Uh, no I didn’t, and he wasn’t dead when I last saw him. I, uh, checked and he was breathing but he was still unconscious.” Todd said but it only seemed to make the older officer more suspicious, as he too raised his brows impossibly higher.

 

“You were able to check his pulse, but not free him?” The younger officer mocked, tilting his head. The older officer had not moved back yet, if anything he moved closer.

 

“He was stuck to the pipe with handcuffs.” Todd said more aggressively. The older officer ‘hmm’d at him, and at last backed away. His eyebrows remained raised.

 

“You didn’t see anything weird this morning, did you Mr. Brotzman?” The younger officer asked.

 

“uh no,” Todd said, but then recalled the men in the grey jumpsuits from upstairs on floor eight. “wait yes,” Then seeing them lean towards him threateningly he finished with a more hesitant “maybe. I-I don’t know.”

 

“Are you aware you just gave every possible response to that question?” The younger officer asked rhetorically.

 

“Uh.” Todd said helplessly.

 

“If I were you, I wouldn’t leave town.” The younger officer said, and the two officers turned to leave the room. Todd felt himself release a breath he wasn’t aware he was holding in, but his relief didn’t last long as the older officer spun back around and pinned his eyes on him.

 

“Really, don’t leave town.” Todd’s eyes widened and he nodded.

 

“I won’t”

 

 The officers seemed somewhat placated by this and finally left.

 

“Hey Todd, come walk with me.” Mr. Palacios said patting Todd on the shoulder and then strolled out of the room. Todd jogged to catch up. In his mind he replayed the scene where the men in the grey jumpsuits came in and took the guard away, then his mind skipped and he watched Dirk run out of the room as he stood still doing nothing.

 

Mr. Palacios snapped in his face, “Todd, snap out of it.”

 

“Yeah. Sorry, what?” Todd said, becoming aware that Mr. Palacios had been talking to him.

 

“I said, they think its connected to something bigger.”

 

“What, like the mob?”

 

“No.” Mr. Palacios looked into Todd’s eyes as if searching for something. Then, perhaps not finding it, he turned away and continued down the hall. “Also, you fired.”

 

“Wait, what?” Todd exclaimed, rushing to catch up again.

 

“Yeah, your involvement in all of this, its complicated.” He said waving a hand as if to shoo him away.

 

“You can’t fire me! I-I just opened a door.”

 

“Some doors aren’t meant to be opened.”

 

“There was a man tied up in there, are you saying I should have done nothing?” Todd said, feeling outraged.

 

“Todd, I understand your upset but this is just the way things have to be.”

 

“Okay, okay, okay.” Todd said giving in, “Is there someway that I could at least get my final check today as a form of severance?”

 

“Well, it’s a same-day termination. I’d have to delay the check.”

 

“What do you mean same-day? It just happened today.”

 

“Today is the day that is the same, today is the day that it happened.”

 

“But any day that it would’ve happened would have been the day that it happened.” He said strongly in defense, “Listen, I need the money.”  Todd said stepping in front of Mr. Palacios so that he could face him.

 

“Yes, but it’s a same-day termination.” Mr. Palacios explained again as if he were talking to a child.

 

“It’s always a day, right? Things happen when they happen. They happen immediately. That’s what happening is.” Mr. Palacios stepped into the elevator as Todd continued to talk.

 

“No Todd,” He said striking out a finger to point at him, “sometimes when things happen, they don’t happen.” Then the doors began to close with Todd firmly on the other side.

 

* * *

 

 

As Todd bussed home he watched the built-in television talk about increased sales in the suburbs. Everything about today was terrible. His car got destroyed, he didn’t have the money for his sister or the rent, everything about the knocked-out guard to the men in the grey suits to the even stranger man in the yellow jacket, and to top it all off he had no job. His eyes stared glumly out the window. He watched as some cat walked by, it walked like it hadn’t moved in years. Its legs were stiff, and forced? It was weird, but soon the bus was driving away and he didn’t care.

 

All he wanted to do was curl up in his apartment, get some sleep, and deal with everything tomorrow. So, when he unlocked his door and turned on his lights to find that Dirk was crawling through his window one could say he was less than pleased.

 

Dirk looked up and saw Todd’s confused, but astounded face. “Hi,” he said dragging out the ‘i.’

 

“What the hell are you doing here?” Todd shouted and stormed over to the window. Dirk had collapsed down onto the floor by this point, but quickly picked himself up.

 

“Well, I did say that the universe would bring us together again, but I certainly didn’t expect it to be so soon, or at all if I’m being _totally_ honest.” He said as though he were pleasantly surprised. Before Todd could get a word in he continued. “When I last talked to you- er,” Dirk paused for a moment “this is a bit embarrassing but I don’t know your name.” Dirk said, waiting for Todd to fill him in. Todd hesitated, this man, this clearly very insane man, who had just broken into his apartment wanted to know his name. However, Dirk’s pleading eyes and the social pressure of the conversation pushed him to confess.

 

“It’s Todd.”

 

“Right, so as I was saying Todd, after I last saw you, I pursued the suited men. It was tricky to find them, let me tell you, but I figured if they were going anywhere it was probably going to be the exit so I ran ahead down those _horrible_ hallways until I reached the outer parking lot by the back of the building. Then, I waited for them to show up, very inconspicuously of course. Until they came out dragging the guard, they were very lucky that no one was there to see that, except for me, obviously. They got into some white van and started heading eastbound but, I don’t own a car so I lost them.” He said dejectedly, but then perked up when he added “But, I did get the license plate!”

 

“So why are you here? How do you know where I live?” Todd questioned angrily.

 

  
“Right, right. I used _a lot_ of CCTV footage to track that van over to this apartment complex.” Todd looked almost impressed, “Very detective-y, I know. This window was open, and I couldn’t get into the building another way so I figured, no harm no foul. No offense Todd, but when I met you at the hotel, although I said we would meet again I didn’t _really_ think I would, or if I did it would be in passing. However, it is no coincidence I ended up in your apartment out of every other apartment in the city, sometimes things simply connect.” Dirk said and walked towards Todd. Suddenly he grabbed his wrist. This was the second time he had done that today, and like the last time he did it, Todd felt surprised, but this time he also felt a little bit intrigued. Dirk studied his face like it held the secrets to the universe.

 

“What are yo-” Todd began, he looked into his eyes for a few seconds then pulled away.

 

“I’m really starting to think that you might be an assistant.” Dirk said smiling. Todd backed away further.

 

“Hold-up here, what are you-” then Todd sighed tiredly, “You know what? I’m not dealing with this right now. I’m tired, I lost my job, everything is-" Todd fumbled for a moment trying to think of an adequate descriptor, "Everything is terrible. Just get out.” He said and walked over to the door.

 

“Woah-ho there Todd, relax. I’m working a case with you now, were partners.” Dirk said and walked towards Todd. Todd’s eyes wavered for a second, but his body remained unmoved.

 

“Nope, not doing this today. Get out.” Todd opened the door and waved his hand at it.

 

“Wait, wait, I have money, I can help pay for rent.” Todd paused at this statement. Dirk took this as the go ahead to continue his story. “My current apartment is about a month overdue and they’re going to kick me out anytime now, so it’s about time I fled anyway,” Todd didn’t look pleased by this information so Dirk quickly added “but I just finished working a case and now I do have money. Plus, you’re out of a job anyway, so how about it, roomie?” Dirk said extending a hand. Todd realized he was right. This crazy man in his living room was right, Todd wasn’t sure if it made him crazy too that he was considering this offer seriously, but desperate times called for desperate measures.

 

“You’ll bring the money by tomorrow?” Todd asked skeptically, his arms crossed over his chest.

 

“Yes, absolutely!” Todd searched Dirk’s face for any signs of dishonesty but found none.

 

“Okay, I guess you can stay.” Dirk did a victory move with his arm and let out a quiet ‘yes’ “But, you’re taking the couch.” Todd added.

 

“No problem, roomie.” Dirk said smiling, his cheerfulness was sort of infectious. “It’s late, I’ll go get my stuff tomorrow.” Then he turned and walked over to the couch, and plopped himself down onto it. “Oh, this couch is _much_ comfier than Margarette’s, no offence to her.”

 

Todd watched as he sat down and wondered if he should object. Instead, he sighed and went to get changed out of his bellboy uniform. He threw on a pair of pajama pants and an old t-shirt, then wondered if he should bring a change of clothes out for Dirk. It seemed only right, after all, he would be staying with him for a bit. Todd grabbed another old t-shirt and pair of sweat pants and brought them out for Dirk. Dirk looked up as he came into the room.

 

“Er, here.” Todd said tossing them at him, then feeling a bit embarrassed for reasons he was not quite sure of, he rubbed the back of his neck. “Figured you might want to get changed.”

 

Dirk marvelled at the clothes that were tossed at him. “Thanks, Todd.” He said so genuinely that Todd felt his cheeks heat.

 

“No problem, there’s some blankets in that cupboard over there, I think.” Todd said pointing at the door in the corner. Todd stood awkwardly for a moment, “Well, goodnight.”

 

“Goodnight Todd.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Ya'll,
> 
> Sorry I've been so late with this last update, I've been swamped with work. Hope you guys like it! let me know what you think, I love hearing from you guys :)


	5. The Morning After: Vans Never Mean Good News

It was the soft pattering of feet that first drew Dirk from his slumber. As he regained consciousness he became aware of the stiff aching feeling in his neck and lower back. Try as he did, he could not fall comfortably back asleep. Regretfully, he pushed off his blankets and opened his eyes. He blearily stared, in that way that sleepy people do, towards the first noise he heard. Which happened to be Todd pouring some coffee beans into a grinder. As Todd flipped on the switch, Dirk thought that were he not already awake, the sound of blended coffee beans would have definitely done the trick.

 

“Morning.” Todd said groggily upon realizing that his guest/impromptu roommate was awake.

 

“What time is it?” Dirk asked, the grit of his throat ground the words into quiet rasp, as he walked into the kitchen.

 

Todd looked over at the microwave clock, “seven thirty.”

 

“Pretty early in the morning to be up.” Dirk commented and rested against the fridge.

 

“I forgot to turn off my alarm last night and it went off.” Dirk nodded at this, and Todd realized he should offer him breakfast.

 

“Do you want something to eat? I’ve got,” Todd paused in thought, “bread, and maybe some old Raisin Bran.”

 

“You eat Raisin Bran?” Dirk asked in disbelief, or maybe disgust, morning expressions all blended together.

 

“The apartment came with it.” Todd shrugged.

 

“How long have you been here then?” Dirk asked curiosity. Todd hummed thinking to himself.

 

“About six months.” Dirk made a face at this.

 

“I’ll have some bread, if that’s all right.”

 

“Sure.” Todd said and reached above Dirk to grab the bread on top of he fridge. Belatedly, Dirk realized that he probably should have shuffled over when Todd walked over to grab it, and it felt a bit late to move now. Todd felt warm when he briefly brushed against him, Dirk blamed the sleepiness on how comforting it felt. “Although, you should know cereal doesn’t go bad.”

 

“I don’t think that’s true.”

 

Todd shrugged at this, and handed Dirk the bag of bread. “There’s butter on the counter and jam in the fridge.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

Very quickly Dirk became aware of just how small the kitchen was, as he tried to manoeuvre around Todd, who was not even moving. The trip to the toaster, which was to the left of Todd near the far end, seemed like an arduous journey to make. But, after a series of _“oh sorry”_ s and _“no you”_ s, bread achieved the sort of desired state of lightly burnt.

 

“What’s your plan for today?” Todd asked, after a period of semi-comfortable morning silence.

 

“Well, I figured we would wander around the building and look for signs of the men in the grey suits, and provided we’re still able to do anything after that, I was going to swing by my apartment to pick up my stuff.”

Todd nods at this and then pauses. “We? As in a thing we are doing _together_?”

 

Dirk sighed in slight annoyance, “yes, I believe I explained _last night_ that we are partners in this case, which means that you and I will be working together.”

 

Todd looked stunned by this piece of information, and frankly felt a little out of the loop. “I-I, what, no,” Todd spluttered some more, until he finally settled on a single question. “Why?”

 

“You don’t _really_ think that you worked at, _and_ discovered, the scene of a crime, plus live at the presumable base of a criminal operation, and that I ended up encountering you both times is some type of coincidence, do you?”

 

“Yes?” Todd said, raising his eyebrow.

 

“No! There are no coincidences Todd, things happen for a reason, and this” Dirk pointed between the two of them, “is one of them. You and I, are destined to meet, and meant to solve this case.”

 

“Assuming I even accept this, which I’m not saying I do, I don’t even understand what the case is.” Todd said crossing his arms.

 

“Oh Todd,” Dirk said in the manner that someone might say _“oh you silly goose”_ in. “Its _only_ our case in the first place _because_ it is not yet understood. That’s kind of my entire job, and now it’s yours too.”

 

“Wait, wait, wait, are you offering me a job? As in a paid position?” Todd asked, uncrossing his arms and leaning forward.

 

“Er, yes and kind of? I am offering you a job, but the offer is kind of like giving someone a birthday card, its their birthday anyways you’re just reminding them of that fact. And I guess the paid position part is true in the non-traditional sense. Upon the completion of the case you will be rewarded, of course it will have very little to do with me and much more to do with the interconnectedness of the universe, which now that I’m saying it I realize it might have to do with me too, as I am also a piece in the interconnected puzzle.” Dirk waved his hand a little in a dismissive gesture, as though he were brushing away the remnants of his tangent. “One way or another you will be reimbursed for your efforts.”

 

Todd looked wholly unimpressed. “I’ve worked for _a lot_ of shady companies, and this spiel really makes it seem like I’m going to be given a lifetime’s worth of expired saltines or something.” He said and his eyes narrowed.

 

“The universe will provide you with what you need, trust me. After solving the case I had before last, I found a lottery ticket and won exactly $5050 and after the money I owed for- er- fridge debt purposes were repaid, I had the perfect amount of money I needed to buy a leather jacket I wanted, an _incredibly_ cheap car, and gas to drive it all the way out to here before it broke down beyond any kind of repair that would probably cost more than the car was worth, _and_ had just enough to pay for a security deposit to move into where I was living pre-yesterday.”

 

“It was just a lucky coincidence that you found a lottery ticket. And it was _your_ decision to spend it that way.”

 

Dirk put his hand on his face, “Todd, there are no coincidences.” He sighed, a little resigned.

“You can choose not to believe me, but you’ll inevitably end up working on this case, better to make the move yourself. Take it from me, happening _to_ things is exponentially better than having things happen to you. I’m going to look for those guys, your welcome to join me.”

 

“I’ll think about it.”

 

“You know where to find me.” Dirk said and crammed the rest of his breakfast into his mouth, before turning and leaving.

 

As he entered the hallway Dirk became aware of the fact that he didn’t really have any idea for finding the men in grey suits, short of knocking on every door until he found theirs. Which, while not necessarily an entirely bad idea, did remind him of the fact he watched them kidnap a man. No, a subtler approach would be better. Wait for them to come to him. He would walk around the building until something happened.

 

So, he walked. And walked. And walked.

_God this is so boring._ Dirk thought, and without a watch or phone to let him know what time it was, he had no idea how much time had passed. _A quick trip over to my apartment will be much more productive then staying here_ he reasoned.

 

* * *

 

 

Todd felt a little bit guilty, but wasn’t _really_ sure why. Logically, not helping to scope out his apartment building would be doing all of his neighbors, who already hated him, a big favor. Out of sight out of mind was practically his motto. But, the nagging feeling of unemployment did have the nasty habit of making one feel useless for no discernible reason.

Instead of dwelling on the fact that he let a man he met _yesterday_ into his apartment building to stalk his neighbors, Todd did what he always did. He grabbed his guitar and flipped on some crap television. The trivia game show, _Guess that Name!_ was playing reruns. Although the show itself was rather self explanatory, Todd had a soft spot for it. Back when he lived with his parents, his family would gather around the television, and drink hot chocolate with whatever the nearest household sweet was. Watching it brought back all kinds of feelings that only good memories can invoke, warm, but like a piece is missing.

Suddenly craving some hot chocolate, Todd pattered into the kitchen. He quickly wrangled himself a cup from a jar of powder he found in his cupboard, and then returned to the couch. But, not before opening the window, sure it was the winter time, yet covered in a blanket with hot chocolate always felt a little stuffier than cozy to him.

Hot chocolate in hand, he gathered up the pile of blankets left over from last nights guest and threw them over himself. The blankets smelled like Dirk. Like cinnamon, vanilla, an unidentifiable spice, and motor oil. Todd breathed in deeply and determined that they smelled _good_ , immediately after he regretted it and decided that he _definitely_ needed to get out more.

Todd dropped the blankets onto his lap and set down his cup of hot chocolate. Then, reaching over next to him, he grabbed his guitar. There wasn’t any particular song that he had in mind when he picked it up, but once he started fiddling with the strings he felt the urge to play _Hotel California_. The song was clearly a metaphor about the music industry, and fame. God, how he wished he had that problem.

Songs naturally blended together, and Todd lost time of how long he’d been playing for. He probably wouldn’t have stopped for another half an hour at least, but a sudden clanging and shouting from outside drew his attention.

 

Todd set his guitar next to him on the couch, and got up to take a look from the window. Outside, he could see four men, dressed like they were in a punk rock band, with baseball bats and crowbars destroying anything they could see. The smaller one howled and took a particularly aggressive swing at Todd’s already destroyed car. Todd, looking closer at the scene, determined that they must have come out of the van spray painted next to him.

It read, “The Rowdy Three.” Todd said to himself in a half whisper. As if hearing Todd calling him, the white haired one spun towards his apartment and looked Todd dead in the eye. Todd’s eyes widened in fear, and he stepped further back into his apartment, away from the window.

The banging and clanging got louder, until it disappeared. For a full ten seconds. Then, it came back twice-fold, this time from within the building.

 

“Come out, come out wherever you are!” One of them yelled from outside. Todd went over to his front door and locked it. Yet, like many things in his life as of late, it failed to make a difference.

 

“This one boss!” Todd heard from outside. Then his door was being kicked in. Three men ran into his apartment, and started hitting anything within their line of sight. The white haired one just walked toward him, his stare unwavering.

 

“Did Dorian send you?” Todd said backing away quickly into his living room. “I promise I’ll have the money by tonight, really.” The white-haired man said nothing, and walked further into the room. His gaze turned to the couch. Todd impulsively grabbed his guitar and held it close to his chest.

 

The man walked up to the couch and then took a deep breath in through his nose. His eyes flicked up to Todd, and he grinned.

 

“Where is he? We know he was here.” He asked. His voice was deep and raspy.

 

“Who?” Todd managed to get out. The white-haired man tilted his head toward the couch, clearly unimpressed.

 

“Icarus.”

 

“I don’t know anyone named Icarus, but a guy named Dirk slept over last night if it makes a difference.” Todd said quickly, his arms crossed holding his guitar.

 

“Where is he?” He said walking closer to Todd.

 

“Todd, what happened around here? Did those men with the grey-oh” Dirk said from the doorway, bags in hand. The three who had presumably run into Todd’s bedroom, rushed back out to the front of his apartment. Dirk dropped his bags, turned, and ran. He made it to the end of the hall before the men rushed out after him, the white-haired man included.

 

Todd stood still for a second, in shock and in expectation of screaming. When ten seconds passed and he still didn’t hear any he cautiously walked towards the hall. Slowly, he poked his head out from the doorway. He didn’t quite believe his eyes. Hovering over Dirk’s clearly incapacitated body, were the four men, who appeared to be inhaling some kind of light from Dirk’s body. With poor timing as usual, they finished whatever it was they were doing and looked up directly at Todd. This time however, they did not come towards him, instead they merely turned around and left.

 

Todd, who was feeling more than a little perplexed, walked over to check on Dirk.

 

“Dirk, wake up.” He said shaking him a little. Then checked his pulse when he didn’t immediately rise. There was a steady heart beat. Relieved, but still worried, he continued to shake him. “Dirk, come on.”

 

From down the hall he heard the opening of a door. After all that noise it was only a matter of time before all his neighbors showed up, and he’d preferably like to be back inside what remained of his apartment by then. Then another thought hit him, the police. Anyone who had heard even half of that would have called them, and here he was, at the center of another crime scene.

 

Excellent.

 

Hearing the sound of footsteps from down the hall Todd looked up and was reminded of who his potential neighbors were.

 Of course, it was the men in the grey suits. How could it not be?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey ya'll,
> 
> Sorry it took so long to update, I've been swamped with work. Although, now that its the summer I should have more time to work on this. I plan on wrapping this project up in about two chapters.


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